Pop Paper Love

Most people begin dating as early as high school. When I was 16, the majority of my peers had crushes or were in some form of relationship. Many of these relationships were based on puppy love, which is typical for teenagers.

At that age, I believed I was ready to have a boyfriend, but in reality, I spent most of my time daydreaming about my crushes. From my personal experience, feelings of loneliness tend to arise around the ages of 15, 16, and 17, as we start to believe that everyone around us has a significant other. This belief is perpetuated by the pressure to fit in with our group of colleagues and friends. It was during this time that I began yearning for my other half.

Initially, I noticed that most of my girlfriends were paired up, not only romantically, but also in groups of two. In each of my high school friend groups, I was always the third wheel, never a priority. This started to bother me greatly. All I wanted was someone I could confide in and share my secrets and laughter with. Looking back, I now realize that even at such a tender age, I was actually searching for my Twin Flame. The feeling of loneliness was so profound that it compelled me to actively seek out my counterpart.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t find him at the high school I attended, so I made the decision to change schools when I was around 17. This turned out to be one of the most stressful events of my life.

It is stressful to adjust to a new situation from meeting new friends to learning about each teacher. Later, I read that changing school is one of the biggest stressors for adolescents. However, I met my goal, but not yet entirely. I did meet my Twin Flame there, but I did not form any meaningful and deep friendships I longed for. I just kept being the 3rd person everywhere!

I recognized something was different with my Twin Flame. I just wanted to be around him all the time, but we did not attend the same class. From the period of my 17 till almost 33, I felt a gradual vanishing of my feelings of loneliness. At first, I desperately wanted to be with someone. To share all the good and bad with them.

A big part of that was thinking, they would remove all the pain from my life. I was depressed, and unknowingly, I saw my Twin Flame as the Source of all the good feelings. I did not know I had to find and cultivate those feelings within first. It is typical when you are young to think someone else will solve your problems, but that is never the case. They can support you, but the responsibility to be happy and make something out of your life is always on you!

The feeling of loneliness started to dissipate when I returned back to God. And what a journey that was! When I started working on myself through various therapies, I began to believe more and more in my own worth and power. I gained self-confidence. Depression started to fade away. I was returning to my True Self! A genuine relationship, even if you are not yet in the physical union, only helps you get back to who you truly are.

That lonely feeling you feel when you are young will be replaced with God´s love for you. He will fill up your heart with joy and happiness. You will find fulfilment, but perhaps not in another person, but in yourself and God. And that is the whole point of loneliness- to turn you back to God and eventually to your Beloved’s arms!