From the time when I was around 16, I was continuously being asked about my relationship status.
Even since younger than 16, every person around me was obsessed with relationships- who is a newly formed couple, who cheated whom, who likes who…
I was often feeling like an outcast because when others were more interested in their romantic pursuits, I was still playing with my Barbie dolls 😛
Later, some of my friends would end up in a relationship when they were only 16 or 17 and then I would start to ask myself what all the fuss is about?
I started to question myself if I was missing something from my life and at that instant, I had my first serious crush.
Everyone´s love obsessions became my reality, but soon enough I escaped from what would be my first relationship.
I was not feeling ready for it- it was much more enjoyable keeping it platonic 🙂
I was crushed after some time of not wanting to start dating this guy, so I fell into depression.
It was actually a dark night of the soul as I later found out.
I lost my feelings, my sense of purpose, my joyfulness… which took me a long time to regain.
In all this time, I was often feeling pressured to “find someone” as if only that would make me happy.
Few times, I believed in this lie and went on a date or two, but that´s something I did not enjoy at all.
It was stupid on my part to want to make others happy by fitting some imaginary box they imagined I should.
What I learned is that people have this image in their heads of how you should be living and when you don´t adhere to their reality, they become disappointed.
Just because some Sarah thinks I should be in a relationship, doesn´t mean that is something I should pursue at any cost.
There are so many unhappy and abusive relationships because of the pressure to fit in.
In truth, you only have to listen to your guidance- you know who is the right person for yourself and when it is the right timing to start your life together.
It is mostly when you become so happy within that those questions about your relationship status stop bothering you- and then- you finally answer affirmatively. ❤